My cousin was in town last week - either Thursday or Friday and we discovered Forlove 21 at the Beverly Center. It's sister to Forever 21 but all accessories. Pretty cool place. We both had gift cards for Macy's and we got TR a bunch of cute outfits. We had lunch at Toast. Toast is a very L.A. place. I try to give the total L.A. experience when I can. I had "the Lus", and that sandwhich was amazing with addictive potential.
Speaking of "for love" and "forever" our wedding anniversary is upon us. Life with Mr A has been pretty great. I've noticed that the longer we are wed the quicker we get past any dispute. Pretty cool. That probably works great for Mr A because I'm a bit dramatic. Now we have little Miss TR and she adds a whole new beauty to life and our relationship.
We're still in awe that we've been blessed with our tiny person. I'm holding her right now. She usually is glued to Mr A's chest but he needed to get into his sleep. Me and TR are on one end of the sofa, he is on the other, my feet are under his thighs. The news is on and I'm slightly watching. Welcome to the Good Life.
I never knew how good this type of life could feel. Thank the Lord for blessing me. I don't know why he did or why this was granted to me, but I am grateful. We plan to remain living in the city, so we won't totally become that couple- you know "I Think I Love My Wife" dull and predictable. My great aunt Bessie and Uncle Major were like that- sans children. As a kid I felt like I was being punished when we went to their house. Their home was beautiful, a show place almost, too much valuable stuff to break and perfectly maintained wood floors that creaked when a kid moved. I'd try to limit my visits to times my grandparents were there. My grandparents defined vivacious.
Mr A was gifted- from me to him- a manstation type grill so he'll do barbecue this weekend. It's nice that folks celebrate and have firework displays in honor of our marriage. :)
Monday, June 30, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Adventures in Mommyhood
It has always been my belief that children train parents more than parents train children.
Mr. A has already got TR accustomed to behavior that mommy doesn't do.
While TR was in the hospital she was always changed prior to eating. Now, no matter how hungry she is, she will not eat unless she has a fresh diaper. Fortunately we are using cloth so if she tinkles a drop we change the diaper. I really like how wasteful cloth allows us to be. The diaper service is grand.
Last night Mr A was outside when TR pooped. She was also hungry. The two always coincide. I guess her poop makes room and she wants to fill it. She was acting super hungry, rubbing her face across my chest, putting her fist in her mouth so I tried to feed her first. She wasn't having that. I laid her down to change her but she hates sitting in her poop so that was a disaster. She began wailing. Her hollering hurt my heart and I just held her close. She looked at me and screamed bloody murder for about 7 minutes. I thought she must be in pain. I called Mr A and he heard her yelling in the background. He was back super quick. By the time he arrived I had unpinned her diapers.
He scooped her up and she immediately stopped screaming. Only thing was she had poop on her butt and then he had it all over his hand. She found her spot in his neck and acted as if she hadn't scared me half to tears.
He never put her down. We got a towel and cleaned her and his hand. We put her diaper on and he fed her.
TR has trained mommy to understand that babies cry to communicate. I know what's best and as much as I want to hug her through her discomfort and crying, I can't just hold her. I can't ignore that she has a diaper full of poop. Sure she'll have to momentarily endure things she doesn't want to endure buts its for the best in the long run.
Mr. A has already got TR accustomed to behavior that mommy doesn't do.
While TR was in the hospital she was always changed prior to eating. Now, no matter how hungry she is, she will not eat unless she has a fresh diaper. Fortunately we are using cloth so if she tinkles a drop we change the diaper. I really like how wasteful cloth allows us to be. The diaper service is grand.
Last night Mr A was outside when TR pooped. She was also hungry. The two always coincide. I guess her poop makes room and she wants to fill it. She was acting super hungry, rubbing her face across my chest, putting her fist in her mouth so I tried to feed her first. She wasn't having that. I laid her down to change her but she hates sitting in her poop so that was a disaster. She began wailing. Her hollering hurt my heart and I just held her close. She looked at me and screamed bloody murder for about 7 minutes. I thought she must be in pain. I called Mr A and he heard her yelling in the background. He was back super quick. By the time he arrived I had unpinned her diapers.
He scooped her up and she immediately stopped screaming. Only thing was she had poop on her butt and then he had it all over his hand. She found her spot in his neck and acted as if she hadn't scared me half to tears.
He never put her down. We got a towel and cleaned her and his hand. We put her diaper on and he fed her.
TR has trained mommy to understand that babies cry to communicate. I know what's best and as much as I want to hug her through her discomfort and crying, I can't just hold her. I can't ignore that she has a diaper full of poop. Sure she'll have to momentarily endure things she doesn't want to endure buts its for the best in the long run.
Monday, June 23, 2008
The Beginning
Our Bradley Coach just sent an email asking for my birth story and how Mr A performed as coach. I have yet to reply.
When they informed us we'd have to be induced, they told us we could have a natural child birth. The swelling was causing me great pain and drugs made TR's heart rate drop so I got an epidural. The epidural actually made my blood pressure drop, but only for a short while.
I would never choose an epidural. It paralyzes you. I was trying to move and couldn't figure out why I was having such difficulty. Then I was informed I couldn't eat once I got it.
They started inducing me, it was so slow. I felt very very little because of the epidural. I later read epidurals slows down labor. So after 72 hours of slow labor I could barely feel and feeling like I was about to die, I asked for a C-section- at least I thought I had. I asked for the C-Section at about 9:30 a.m. I was in the operating room before 10 a.m. Mr A told me the surgery had been discussed and scheduled the night before.
The doctors had made the surgery decision. Mr A and I had just discussed asking for it when they came and told us they would have to do one. I can't remember that convo.
The surgery wasn't bad, TR entered the world hollering like a champ. Recovery from the surgery wasn't bad either. The swelling was terrible but the water retention caused me to not have pain from the surgery.
That Bradley class was pretty pricey. I wonder if I could get a refund.
I spent a few moments crying, wondering what I'd done to make my baby come early, wondering what I could have done to change things. All of it made me be grateful for simple things. Having a baby is usually such a simple thing, and when my simple pregnancy got complicated I realized that blessings exists in simplicity. To never experiece the difficulty in something is a blessing.
Little Miss TR is home, and her cries, her coos, her kicks, her smiles are a blessing. They are a regular reminder of things I know not to take for granted. When she cries she gets a kiss from mommy and/or daddy. Today we double teamed her and showered her with kisses.
Perhaps I had a lesson to learn from my birth day. Even if I didn't have to learn something, I learned a lesson. Perhaps I'll delve into it later.
When they informed us we'd have to be induced, they told us we could have a natural child birth. The swelling was causing me great pain and drugs made TR's heart rate drop so I got an epidural. The epidural actually made my blood pressure drop, but only for a short while.
I would never choose an epidural. It paralyzes you. I was trying to move and couldn't figure out why I was having such difficulty. Then I was informed I couldn't eat once I got it.
They started inducing me, it was so slow. I felt very very little because of the epidural. I later read epidurals slows down labor. So after 72 hours of slow labor I could barely feel and feeling like I was about to die, I asked for a C-section- at least I thought I had. I asked for the C-Section at about 9:30 a.m. I was in the operating room before 10 a.m. Mr A told me the surgery had been discussed and scheduled the night before.
The doctors had made the surgery decision. Mr A and I had just discussed asking for it when they came and told us they would have to do one. I can't remember that convo.
The surgery wasn't bad, TR entered the world hollering like a champ. Recovery from the surgery wasn't bad either. The swelling was terrible but the water retention caused me to not have pain from the surgery.
That Bradley class was pretty pricey. I wonder if I could get a refund.
I spent a few moments crying, wondering what I'd done to make my baby come early, wondering what I could have done to change things. All of it made me be grateful for simple things. Having a baby is usually such a simple thing, and when my simple pregnancy got complicated I realized that blessings exists in simplicity. To never experiece the difficulty in something is a blessing.
Little Miss TR is home, and her cries, her coos, her kicks, her smiles are a blessing. They are a regular reminder of things I know not to take for granted. When she cries she gets a kiss from mommy and/or daddy. Today we double teamed her and showered her with kisses.
Perhaps I had a lesson to learn from my birth day. Even if I didn't have to learn something, I learned a lesson. Perhaps I'll delve into it later.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
My mommy and my baby
Pretty soon, I'm going to write an actual post and finish my birth story.
Some sorta way TR got spoiled. The lactation consultant said babies who get lots of skin to skin contact go home earlier. So mommy (me) spent the day holding TR and daddy (Mr A) spent the night. I guess they didn't mean two parents coming to hold the baby a large part of a 24 hour period.
I don't consider a baby wanting to be held a bad thing, if you are able to continue holding them. Eventually TR won't want to be held. She won't be 30 trying to--- hmmm.... perhaps I'm wrong. I still love to be held.
Some sorta way TR got spoiled. The lactation consultant said babies who get lots of skin to skin contact go home earlier. So mommy (me) spent the day holding TR and daddy (Mr A) spent the night. I guess they didn't mean two parents coming to hold the baby a large part of a 24 hour period.
I don't consider a baby wanting to be held a bad thing, if you are able to continue holding them. Eventually TR won't want to be held. She won't be 30 trying to--- hmmm.... perhaps I'm wrong. I still love to be held.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
West Wing L& D- Part 2
So I hear the nurses discussing where to move me. They decided on the lovely labor and delivery wing. That should have clued me in that a delivery was in my very near future. Bed rest was my fantasy.
It's still a blur and I have to ask Mr A to fill in pieces but I'll recount as best I can. I had intended to drag this story out for a couple weeks but at the urging of S30 I'll share a bit more. Please pardon the changing tense, I'm reliving as I recount the story.
I get settled in the hospital room and am told I have high levels of protein in my urine. The nurse comes in with a steroid shot. These folks are moving too fast, I decline the shot. They said its to speed up the maturation of the babies lungs. In my mind I'm still not on board with an early delivery and I don't want to introduce drugs to my baby if I can avoid it. If we wait one more week, her lungs will be mature. We were so close to full term.
Mr A had gone to move the car. When he returned I told him what was going on with the shot. He told the nurse we needed info on this shot. One of the nurses went to get us info.
I tell them I want to wait for the results of the 24 urine sample before making a decision. In hindsight I don't think I had any decision making room. Delivery was a done deal.
Mr A goes home to get some of our things. He returns with the laptop and I send emails that I'll be on hospital bed rest. I'm firm in my fantasy.
My blood pressure is constantly being taken. Mr A was watching it and I was watching his reaction to it. We had agreed that I wouldn't worry about it. I have no idea why it rose so quickly and kept rising. They kept asking if I had a headache or blurry vision. I didn't. Mr A said as high as my pressure was, I should have had a headache. I don't know what it got to but it clearly- to everyone observing it- wasn't safe. But I felt fine.
Various doctors came in with papers for me to sign. I asked questions and with great hesitancy signed. The neonatologists came to tslk to us and tell us about the plan for TR and babies who arrive at her age. It never occured to me to deliver at a hospital that had the leading neonatal center, fortunately that is where we were.
While we were waiting on my 24 hour urine I told the dr. I'd had that taken a sample while I was in the Bay- just a couple of weeks before. I told her if anything had been wrong they would have told me.
The results came back the following evening.. I knew 3000 was mild and 5000 was severe. I was thinking, hoping I'd be mild and get bed rest. I was 10,000. I cried, I knew TR would have to be delivered. I didn't know all the why's but I knew there was a reason I'd been checked in the hospital.
I now weigh 7 more pounds than my pre-pregnancy weight. It feels lovely to button my pants again, although today they kept slipping down.
It's still a blur and I have to ask Mr A to fill in pieces but I'll recount as best I can. I had intended to drag this story out for a couple weeks but at the urging of S30 I'll share a bit more. Please pardon the changing tense, I'm reliving as I recount the story.
I get settled in the hospital room and am told I have high levels of protein in my urine. The nurse comes in with a steroid shot. These folks are moving too fast, I decline the shot. They said its to speed up the maturation of the babies lungs. In my mind I'm still not on board with an early delivery and I don't want to introduce drugs to my baby if I can avoid it. If we wait one more week, her lungs will be mature. We were so close to full term.
Mr A had gone to move the car. When he returned I told him what was going on with the shot. He told the nurse we needed info on this shot. One of the nurses went to get us info.
I tell them I want to wait for the results of the 24 urine sample before making a decision. In hindsight I don't think I had any decision making room. Delivery was a done deal.
Mr A goes home to get some of our things. He returns with the laptop and I send emails that I'll be on hospital bed rest. I'm firm in my fantasy.
My blood pressure is constantly being taken. Mr A was watching it and I was watching his reaction to it. We had agreed that I wouldn't worry about it. I have no idea why it rose so quickly and kept rising. They kept asking if I had a headache or blurry vision. I didn't. Mr A said as high as my pressure was, I should have had a headache. I don't know what it got to but it clearly- to everyone observing it- wasn't safe. But I felt fine.
Various doctors came in with papers for me to sign. I asked questions and with great hesitancy signed. The neonatologists came to tslk to us and tell us about the plan for TR and babies who arrive at her age. It never occured to me to deliver at a hospital that had the leading neonatal center, fortunately that is where we were.
While we were waiting on my 24 hour urine I told the dr. I'd had that taken a sample while I was in the Bay- just a couple of weeks before. I told her if anything had been wrong they would have told me.
The results came back the following evening.. I knew 3000 was mild and 5000 was severe. I was thinking, hoping I'd be mild and get bed rest. I was 10,000. I cried, I knew TR would have to be delivered. I didn't know all the why's but I knew there was a reason I'd been checked in the hospital.
I now weigh 7 more pounds than my pre-pregnancy weight. It feels lovely to button my pants again, although today they kept slipping down.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Get What You Need
You cant always get what you want
You cant always get what you want
But if you try sometimes well you might find
You get what you need
That part of the Rolling Stone song ocassionally reverbrates through my head. Maybe its due to that commercial.
I'm realizing that with regular frequency people don't get what they want while others don't appreciate having what someone else is praying to recieve.
Perhaps its similar to having great difficulty finding what you are looking for but once you stop looking you discover it right under your nose.
This is not a relationship post but my above thoughts make me think of Rachel, Leah and Jacob. Rachel had Jacob's love but was miserable because she wanted his child.
Leah had Jacob's children but was sad because she wanted his love.
Either sister could have been happy with what they were blessed with but both were too focused on what they lacked.
I remember meeting a guy with super long thick lashes and I discovered that he actuslly had to keep them cut. That's a problem I would have loved to have. My lashes are thick and certainly not short but my sister and most of my paternal cousins have longer and thicker so I can't flatter myself with what I've got. That's another issue- what you have might be good but when you know there is better to be had, sometimes you forget to be thankful or even notice its nice to have.
I want to be grateful and appreciate what I have and not allow my focus to be kept on things I want or who has it better. This post isn't about material items either.
This post is just about wants in general. Most of us want something (I say most cuz there is always that person who says "I have everything I could want.") Most of us see someone who takes for granted what we greatly desire.
Such is life- there is nothing to do but recognize and be grateful for our own blessings.
I'm not a subscriber to the "I complained about my lack of shoes, until I saw a man with no feet", school of thought. My gratefulness needs to stand alone, not ride on the back of someone with less. Isn't it heartless to feel better because someone has it worse than you? That's no better than feeling bad because someone has it better.
You cant always get what you want
But if you try sometimes well you might find
You get what you need
That part of the Rolling Stone song ocassionally reverbrates through my head. Maybe its due to that commercial.
I'm realizing that with regular frequency people don't get what they want while others don't appreciate having what someone else is praying to recieve.
Perhaps its similar to having great difficulty finding what you are looking for but once you stop looking you discover it right under your nose.
This is not a relationship post but my above thoughts make me think of Rachel, Leah and Jacob. Rachel had Jacob's love but was miserable because she wanted his child.
Leah had Jacob's children but was sad because she wanted his love.
Either sister could have been happy with what they were blessed with but both were too focused on what they lacked.
I remember meeting a guy with super long thick lashes and I discovered that he actuslly had to keep them cut. That's a problem I would have loved to have. My lashes are thick and certainly not short but my sister and most of my paternal cousins have longer and thicker so I can't flatter myself with what I've got. That's another issue- what you have might be good but when you know there is better to be had, sometimes you forget to be thankful or even notice its nice to have.
I want to be grateful and appreciate what I have and not allow my focus to be kept on things I want or who has it better. This post isn't about material items either.
This post is just about wants in general. Most of us want something (I say most cuz there is always that person who says "I have everything I could want.") Most of us see someone who takes for granted what we greatly desire.
Such is life- there is nothing to do but recognize and be grateful for our own blessings.
I'm not a subscriber to the "I complained about my lack of shoes, until I saw a man with no feet", school of thought. My gratefulness needs to stand alone, not ride on the back of someone with less. Isn't it heartless to feel better because someone has it worse than you? That's no better than feeling bad because someone has it better.
Friday, June 06, 2008
Life is A Miracle
It was a cool day in May. I was wearing a green knit outfit. I can't call it a sweat suit but it was similiar to that. Mr A and I were trying to figure out alternate routes so we'd know which way was best when I went into labor. Because of our exploring routes we were running a wee bit late.
We got to the dr. for our regular prenatal visit. We had a another appointment prior to that so we walked to lunch and came back for the 2nd appointment. They had already taken my blood pressure which was a little high but nothing extreme. Apparently it was extreme since my blood pressure had always ran normal.
We were seen by one of the high risk doctors. Not because I was high risk but she just happened to be who we saw. I had requested to be placed in high risk care from the start but was too 'healthy'. My cousin passing after childbirth made me want to be extra cautious.
The dr had the nurse take my 'pressuh' again and it was still up. She told me to go to the hospital so they could check me out. She said she knew I was feeling well but not to go home, go to the hospital. We went and they hooked me up to a monitor that took my pressure every 10 or so minutes. I think that beeping and arm squeezing was making it go up. They put me on a fetal monitor and did an ultra sound. TR was fine.
It's a bit of a blur but eventually I was admitted.
I figured I was going to be put on bed rest. Tune in for the second part of our birth story.
We got to the dr. for our regular prenatal visit. We had a another appointment prior to that so we walked to lunch and came back for the 2nd appointment. They had already taken my blood pressure which was a little high but nothing extreme. Apparently it was extreme since my blood pressure had always ran normal.
We were seen by one of the high risk doctors. Not because I was high risk but she just happened to be who we saw. I had requested to be placed in high risk care from the start but was too 'healthy'. My cousin passing after childbirth made me want to be extra cautious.
The dr had the nurse take my 'pressuh' again and it was still up. She told me to go to the hospital so they could check me out. She said she knew I was feeling well but not to go home, go to the hospital. We went and they hooked me up to a monitor that took my pressure every 10 or so minutes. I think that beeping and arm squeezing was making it go up. They put me on a fetal monitor and did an ultra sound. TR was fine.
It's a bit of a blur but eventually I was admitted.
I figured I was going to be put on bed rest. Tune in for the second part of our birth story.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Random
When Mr A and I moved shortly after getting married, we had no idea we lived on such a great bus line. We didn't know we lived on any bus line. We loved the floor plan and the area and that was that.
Now with gas - at Costco- approaching $5 a gallon I'm even more appreciative to live on the bus line. My sis was in town last week, we stopped to put gas in her rental before dropping it off. The tank was just a slight bit from full. She paid $6 to get it to full. I haven't put gas in the car for a long time and while I know the price, seeing the reality of how much just a little costs, was a shock.
Then Mr A and I went to Costco for gas. The tank was 1/2 full when we got there but it took @$45 to get it a bit past full. So in my head I'm calculating. $90 a week for one tank- although I'm sure we used more than that going back and forth to the hospital which is 10 miles each way. I decided to utilize the bus. At $90 a week, by the end of the month our gas bill could be a car note.
Mr A has been riding his bike to practice. He's looking great, too- whoo hoo!. We work from home so that wasn't an expense. Some say work close to home but working from home is the only way to go at these gas prices. I bet telecommuting will pick up. The car gets to rest, until the bus isn't convenient, nighttime travel or we have shopping.
I'm sure with gas this high and the price of it increasing, bus service will expand. At least I hope it does. It would be nice if public transportation was convienent to the masses.
I missed being a mommy on Mother's day. I was OOOOO so close. Mr A did get me the ice cream cake I'd been talking about for a month- we shared it with the wonderful hospital staff who we really liked. Any ideas on what TR and I should get Mr A on his very first Father's Day?
Now with gas - at Costco- approaching $5 a gallon I'm even more appreciative to live on the bus line. My sis was in town last week, we stopped to put gas in her rental before dropping it off. The tank was just a slight bit from full. She paid $6 to get it to full. I haven't put gas in the car for a long time and while I know the price, seeing the reality of how much just a little costs, was a shock.
Then Mr A and I went to Costco for gas. The tank was 1/2 full when we got there but it took @$45 to get it a bit past full. So in my head I'm calculating. $90 a week for one tank- although I'm sure we used more than that going back and forth to the hospital which is 10 miles each way. I decided to utilize the bus. At $90 a week, by the end of the month our gas bill could be a car note.
Mr A has been riding his bike to practice. He's looking great, too- whoo hoo!. We work from home so that wasn't an expense. Some say work close to home but working from home is the only way to go at these gas prices. I bet telecommuting will pick up. The car gets to rest, until the bus isn't convenient, nighttime travel or we have shopping.
I'm sure with gas this high and the price of it increasing, bus service will expand. At least I hope it does. It would be nice if public transportation was convienent to the masses.
I missed being a mommy on Mother's day. I was OOOOO so close. Mr A did get me the ice cream cake I'd been talking about for a month- we shared it with the wonderful hospital staff who we really liked. Any ideas on what TR and I should get Mr A on his very first Father's Day?
