During our engagement I'd ocassionally be annoyed at folks. I'd be annoyed for silly reasons like I thought they were lying on themselves or bragging or being competitive. I'd be in Mr. A's ear sharing my complaints.
One day he stopped, looked at me and asked, "why do you care? What impact do these people have on your life that makes you care what they do?" He said it in such a way that I felt a tug of ........ shame. I said something like "they think I'm too stupid to know the truth." He told me their lies had nothing to do with me. I had to ask myself "why do I care?", I had no reason. I just had too much free time and was letting my mind be idle and giving the devil room to get comfy. I decided to let it all go. I did.
It's good when your mate won't let you dwell in crazy. I told him about my little blog spat and he was quite disappointed. I tried to explain the reason but he was like "you can't let folks control you and when you get into that and allow yourself to respond you are letting people in cyber world who you will never meet, control you." Again its good when folks don't let you pretend your mess doesn't exist. He will not let me dwell in madness. I appreciate that.
Mr. A has taught me I don't need to fight other folks battles. This is actually a work in progress. As we can see from the burglarly post he has this issue too. He was trying to stop a thief on gp and not because he thought he was taking our stuff. We're both into service. I think my desire to get involved is a hazzard of my profession. I feel like I can protect people. If I see what I think is injustice (but who am I to judge) I want to jump in and defend. I don't want to see someone be mistreated if I can maybe stop it.
I take that stuff more personally then I would a personal injustice. I feel like I can handle stuff, beat me down but I will always recover.
The amazing thing is when I saw someone doing the same stuff I used to do- being overly concerned and focused about stuff that didn't matter to their own life- I realized the madness of it. Its good to be able to see the mess you espcaped and knowing why your really don't want to go back into. I was even more grateful to Mr. A for being strong.
If I'm satisfied with my own life and living it to the fullest I won't have time or desire to pause to focus on others. So when I get too interested in what others are doing- in a way that isn't positive- I find something to do.
Once you get free- stay free.
Okay, I think that was the end, I'm watching this red lobster commercial and feeling hungry and I can write no more.
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8 comments:
i agree w/ mr. A. don't give folks that try to bait you into nonsense the satisfaction of succeeding in what they're trying to do.
Gotta love Mr. A! But um...I'm still gonna need for him not to unleash Operation Shock and Awe on the homeless population any more!
I really wish I could rise above the temptation to get at people who try to pull it. And I'm a lot better than I used to be. But I promise that there are times when I simply can't do it.
If it's the case that people are trying to push my buttons, there are times when I'm going to oblige them.
Aw! He's absolutely right, too. I'm a lot like you to let stuff get on my nerves that actually has nothing at all to do with me. My sister has to check me on it sometimes. It's good your hubby teaches you a lot! =)
commercials are just wrong!
"It's good when your mate won't let you dwell in crazy." Haha! That Mr. A is a good one! lol
You know, this whole blogging thing is starting to get on my nerves. I don't like thinking about it when I'm not near a compute either, but there are some things that I've seen and read that make me so disgusted.
I try my best not to engage in the foolishness, but it's amazing how you can feel the negative energy permeating through the screen! I'm not all that shocked by how childish it all gets. I mean, I see it at my job every week. But, blogging was supposed to be a respite for me. Not a place to duke it out. lol
One thing I will say is this. I'm a very argumentative woman and like you I don't like to see injustice, or someone being bullied. But, this whole blogging thing is really helping me to tame the savage beast inside of me. Besides, I like my subjects right in front of me so in case I need to bitch slap somebody, I can. Why go at it over the net, getting your blood pressure all high when you can't even take real physical action? Not that I am one of those wild women who gets into a street fight at least once a year. But, if a laying on of hands was necessary, it isn't even possible! I mean, what are we all going to say? "Meet me at Starbucks on Saturday morning so I can whoop your ass!" Sheesh.
Sugar that's funny. Sometimes I get road rage. I can't allow blog rage to get me because after the rage I realize I've got 0 chance to lay hands and that makes it even more pointless.
yeah, blog fights are a bit pointless as most of the time, they are being waged by people who do not know each other and will most likely never meet. Also, don't forget that sometimes people hype us fights and wage net wars just to increase the traffic to their sites. So unless someone is cutting you a check for all the nice Google ad click money, I'd say Mr. A is right in that you should keep it moving.
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